We're almost halfway through January now - did you make any New Years Resolutions? Well, if you did and they've already slipped through your fingers, you're not alone. Research shows that by mid-January most of the "New Year's Resolutions" people have made on January 1st are barely staggering along, and - according to polls - 1 out of 3 people have given up on their resolutions completely by the end of January. So how are you doing with your resolutions - are you working on them, or have they already been forgotten almost entirely?

 

Anniversaries, birthdays, and dates are important markers in our lives, and often signify that it's time to remember, take stock, and/or change something up. Naturally, ringing in a New Year is one of those times when people feel compelled to start something, stop something, or just do "something different" with their lives. In fact, statistics show that 45% of Americans make New Year's Resolutions every year - almost half of us! What studies also tell us is that -ultimately - only 8% of the people who make resolutions have any success at keeping them, and that's a pretty dismal statistic.

 

Traditionally, when it comes to looking at a New Year, doing "something different" generally means something they're not happy with about themselves - their weight, their career, their financial situation, their homes, and/or their relationships (or lack thereof). So making a New Year's Resolution is generally about "fixing" something that you think isn't working. So - here's a thought - why not try switching your old tradition of "making New Year's RESOLUTIONS" to the idea of "making New Year's GOALS" instead?

 

Why Making New Years GOALS Works Better Than Making RESOLUTIONS!

Words are powerful; be careful how you use them, especially when you're talking to yourself, because it's amazing what they can do for you - and to you. That's why using "goals" instead of "resolutions" works so well. In fact, you can shift the whole paradigm from negative to positive simply by thinking of resolutions as goals for what you want to do with your life this year, rather than resolving to "fix" all the things you've been doing - or not doing - that you don't like!

 

Here's why shifting your thinking away from "RESOLUTIONS" and toward the idea "GOALS" is important - you're much more likely to be successful at them! Think about it: goals are doable, attainable - they're meant to succeed. They're also pretty exciting and even - well - sort of sexy. RESOLUTIONS, on the other hand, have a sad reputation, they sound difficult because they often are, and they sort of come with the assumption that they're going to be broken - eventually. Just take a look at the definitions below, courtesy of our friendly friends at Webster's dictionary:

 

• RESOLUTION: a firm decision to do or not to do something

• GOAL: the object of a person's ambition or effort; an aim or desired result.

 

Say these two words to yourself - which one sounds like it might be more interesting or even fun - the "RESOLUTION" or the "GOAL?" Pursuing a "GOAL" definitely sounds more interesting, doesn't it? Just listen to those words -"ambition," "aim," and "desired result;" how does that sound? Well, sign me up.

 

Now - how does "RESOLUTION" sound? What you hear is - you need to "do or not do" something. Frankly, this sounds like Yoda talking about something that's going to be hard or unpleasant. And if we're honest; the idea of a "RESOLUTION" also conjures up images of a hand on a Bible, and solemnly swearing: "I am going to do this/I'm not going to do this, so help me…." etc. etc.

 

So the difference between GOALS and RESOLUTIONS is that one tends to be more positive, and one tends to be more negative. One is a "want to" - and one is a "have to." One sounds encouraging - like - you've got what it takes and "let's DO this!" The other sounds like judgment - as in - you (or the world) has looked you over and found you lacking in some way or something, so you'd better get busy.

 

Do you really want to make a list and commit to telling yourself every day that:

 

A. You're doing something unfortunate (bad) and you need to stop doing it immediately

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AND/OR

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B. You're not doing something that you should be doing (good) and you need to get busy doing it right now!

 

Either way - giving yourself a list of "RESOLUTIONS" is pretty discouraging, just take a look at this poll (one of hundreds around this time of year) that lists the top 10 "New Years RESOLUTIONS" for 2015. Check out the "subliminal," underlying messages they send:

 

1. Lose weight (message: I am overweight)

2. Exercise (message: I am unfit/unhealthy)

3. Eat healthier (message: I eat like crap)

4. Learn something new (message: I'm boring and/or an idiot)

5. Spend less, save more (message: I'm a spendthrift and/or I'm going live in a cardboard box shelter when I retire)

6. Drink less (message: My loved ones have AA on speed dial)

7. Travel (message: I need to get out of here)

8. Give back to the community (message: I feel guilty/useless and/or I don't deserve what I have)

9. Spend more time with family/loved ones (message: My children don't know what I look like and/or I can't remember their names)

10. Relax (message: I have so much to do all the time)

 

Call me crazy, but I don't see anything here that I'd like to jump out of bed every morning and get busy doing - or even not doing - do you? This, to me, is the whole problem with the idea of RESOLUTIONS - they aren't happy, they aren't joyful, they aren't about finding and channelling your best self. And that's what they're supposed to encourage us to do, right? A RESOLUTION doesn't make you want to be more, do more, reach higher and dream bigger. This kind of subconscious or unconscious negativity is exactly why they're so hard to keep!

 

Goals are GOALS, on the other hand, and are about something else entirely.

 

Why set GOALS Instead of RESOLUTIONS?

Simply put -- having GOALS helps us move forward in our lives. When you think about it - GOALS are often synonymous with rewards and advancements, they have an upward trajectory, and there's a payoff at the end. GOALS are vitally important because they:

• help us take a moment to dream, to expand our visions….

• can move us toward making both short and long-term improvements….

• help us shift habits or behaviors that may not be positive….

• help us look at a "bigger picture" of ourselves, our work, our relationships, and our lives…

• help us "get real" about what we're doing, and what we want out of life….

 

Finally - without goals - you can get bogged down and end up stagnating personally or professionally - seriously!

 

"The trouble with not having a GOAL is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score…."  - Bill Copeland

 

Change Your Resolutions to Goals - and They Will Be Yours!

Looking at the list of "Resolutions" above - how can these be transformed into something you actually want to do - and have a very good chance of succeeding at? By re-thinking them as goals - goals about what you want to do, be, make, create, or accomplish for yourself this year. Remember that goals are positive - and pro-active, they should excite and interest you - there needs to be something about them that you want to do - or they won't have the power to help you make them work! What do I mean? Let's start with:

 

Resolution # 1: Lose Weight

Goal # 1: I am going to experiment with new recipes until I find and learn to cook 7 delicious low-fat, low-calorie dinners that are quick and easy!

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Resolution # 2: Exercise

Goal # 2: I want to feel stronger and healthier, so I will take that Rumba class 3 times a week, and walk my dogs to the park and back 3 times a week!

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Resolution # 3: Eat healthier

Goal # 3: I will brown-bag a really great salad for my lunches rather than going to the deli every day (bonus - save money!)

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Etc. Etc. Etc. You get the idea!

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"Give me a stock clerk with a GOAL and I'll give you a man who will make history. Give me a man with no GOALS - and I'll give you a stock clerk…"  J.C. Penney

                                                    

So what are you planning to do, be, make, create, or accomplish this year? Try for GOALS, not resolutions, and go for it!

 

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